The last entry I made in this blog was a long, long time ago. I spoke of all the changes that were happening in my life, the biggest, hardest change of all was the letting go of my relationship with my Honey. A very challenging time in my life.
Well as the old adage goes "If you love something set it free, if it returns it is yours, if does not then it never was yours to begin with...."
I set my Honey free, I also set myself free, freedom from agreeing to things that are not healthy for me and at that time things were not healthy for me. But time apart, time to re-evaluate, re-adjust brought my Honey back to me in MUCH healthier frame of mind, attitude towards the plans we had for our life together.....and my heart leaped at this and once again I took a Leap of Faith, back into his arms, sensing, knowing that a definite change had occured and finally, we were on the path that we had envisioned for our relationship and we are still going on that path, stronger than ever, more together than we have ever been.
I set him free and he came back to me and I came back to him and life is all the more beautiful because of it....I know with every ounce of my being that had I not taken this step and just let things stay the way they were we would not have survived and our relationship would have been irrevocably broken.
Since that moment Life has been very, very full for the both of us. My youngest graduated from high school, my oldest got married, my soon-to-be-bro-in-law got married, and my Honey and I are getting married, on Oct 3rd, 2009......between our time apart, then reuniting, the weddings in our families, we have really, really learned that what he and I have is extra extraordinary and we have both become manically committed to keeping what we have a cherishing the beauty of it....we've learned from our mistakes and are trying our best to take those lessons to heart and to keep moving forward. Love like ours does not come along every day and we've seen that up close and personal, too many people we know are either struggling or just "making do" and that is not for us.....we treasure every day together, every gift of ourselves to each other...
All of this was made even more valuable to us in the last two weeks as I discovered that I had a tumor in my bladder, which I had removed yesterday. Next Monday we will be meeting with the oncologist to see what the pathology report has to say about all of this.....there is nothing on earth like the word "cancer" to bring your life, your stresses, your worries, your petty greivances to blinding halt! Your entire life goes into a massive reprioritizing mode and some things become so much more valuable and other things lose their weight completely and utterly.
These are the times in your life where the chafe is blown away and the reality of your life, your loves, your goals comes into sharp focus.
I will laugh a lot more, I will play a lot more, I will love more deeply, I will treasure my family and friends and all the blessings and gifts that I have. I know this much as well, I will be getting rid of the negative things in my life that are sucking the happiness, the contentment from my days.
Life IS too short and some of these things are taking up too much of my precious time on Earth.
